Dear cancer....I'm still here.

Dear cancer,

It's been a year now since we started going at it... You took my grandfather when I was young, and I never really got to know him because of it. Several years passed and then you decide to take my father from me. He's my hero and losing him was something I've never really gotten over.

Last year you started in with me. I ran thru all the emotions and then settled on just one. My family and friends came and lined up behind me and we all prepared ourselves for what needed to be done. I prepared myself for bad days but I honestly wasn't expecting how bad those days would be. It was like hell on earth but now I know I can handle anything you can dish out. No way I was gonna quit. And in case you are thinking about coming back, my promise to you is more of the same from me.

Now, I'm sitting at home enjoying my evening. Spent the whole week this week putting in full days at the office. I'll be going for a nice bike ride in the morning. I'm able to sit in the saddle now without any pain and my legs are getting stronger each week. I am still receiving chemo treatments for the next few months but that's just to help make sure I don't have to deal with you again.

You were never welcome here and now you're gone....but I'm still here.

Rene




- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Out of the hospital, day one...

Man I feel like a mess but it's good to be home. No kidding. I never got more than two hours of sleep at any one time while in the hospital. Keeper having people coming in to take blood, or give me meds, or take my vital signs. My favorite was the nurse that would bust into the room at three am just to ask if there was anything I needed... It's my impression that she might not go very far in the health care industry.

I think the best moment for me was getting wheeled out of the lobby and seeing mom waiting in the driveway with the car. As soon as I got into the car, a huge wave of emotions hit me all at once. I thought about my father and grandfathers fight with cancer. Thought about how great God was in allowing me to be well enough to leave the hospital only four days after going through two major procedures, a colostomy, and the removal of a grapefruit sized tumor. We thanked the surgeon before leaving and he said it wasn't him and then proceeds to point up to the sky... Someone is looking after me...

The fight isn't over but we just won a huge victory. The surgeon feels he got all the cancer and now it's time to heal up before another round of chemotherapy to ensure there is no trace in my body. We are done with being defensive and now it's time to go on the offensive with this...

I smell arroz con pollo cooking now so I better go... Man, It's good to be home.



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

In recovery mode

Surgery is done and the doc said everything went great. No indications that it's spread anywhere else. My main goal now is just trying to move around. Taking some good meds right now. They don't let you sleep much here but it's all good. Looking forward to going home.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Getting ready for tomorrow

Tomorrow is the big day. Hopefully I will be cancer free by this time tomorrow. Lots of things going thru my mind right now. The ostomy I'll be having is a life changer but it's way better than the alternative. I'll be surprised if I get any sleep tonight but that's ok. There will be plenty of time for that later. I go in tomorrow at 5:30am and the surgery is scheduled for around 7am. I'm ready to get this over with. Let's do this!!



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

...almost time.

Tomorrow I go in for my pre operative appointments. It's been a few weeks since ive finished up chemotherapy and radiation treatments and all of it has been to prepare for Thursday's surgery. I'm not looking forward to it but I am looking forward to getting it over with. The doc says I'll be in the hospital anywhere from 5-10 days...fun. Oh well, let's do this. Three more days to go. I'm ready to be cancer free.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

The countdown begins

Ok...it's been a while since my last post. Since my last post I finished up my first round of chemo and radiation treatments. The doc told me I breezed thru the treatments but he didn't fool me. If I breezed thru it, I'd hate to think of what they considered struggling..haha. I started at 185 lbs and finished the treatments six weeks later at a svelte 155 lbs.

It's been two and a half weeks now since I finished and I've managed to put on a few pounds and my energy has started to come back. I jumped on the bike this last weekend but only was able to ride 15 mins before I was totally exhausted. I have a long way to go but as bad as I felt, it was good to finally get out even if it was only a few miles.

I met with my surgeon yesterday and the tests showed that there was some shrinkage of the tumor. We discussed the procedure and what to expect afterwards. Because of the location of the tumor, I will be required to have a permanent ostomy to ensure they remove all the cancer in the area. I'll admit I wasn't too happy after hearing the news and even felt a little angry. Looking at it now, it's much better than the alternative. I've now made it into a personal challenge to not let it change my life. If people can ride with missing limbs than there is no reason why I should let an ostomy get in my way...

My surgery is scheduled for July 26th followed by four and a half months of chemotherapy. I have a few weeks to enjoy the Summer before we hit it hard again. I'm a little nervous about the procedure but I know it's nothing I can't handle...looking forward to my upcoming cancer free days.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Are we there yet?

Well, week number five of chemo and radiation is coming to an end. The last week has been tough. It's still been a struggle holding my weight and I have to say I haven't been very successful in that battle. The good thing is that there isn't much longer to go in this round of treatments. The long weekend coming up means no treatments on Monday and should help give me a chance to rest and maybe put on some more weight. One more day before before the final week of round one.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone